Sunday, January 24, 2010

Yes, I feel like a hater.

It's funny sometimes how your friends have the same internal thoughts ( read that as struggles ) as you do. I say funny because in theory, of course your friends have the same thoughts as you, that's why you're friends, right? But so much so that you could have written what they wrote? You could have said exactly what they said word for word?

I know of several folks that have weight loss surgery recently. They made the decision to do something about their weight, something they have struggled with for years and years.
They did it and are reaping the bennys.
I decided the last week of December 2009 to take back my health.... and rejoined the gym, started working out, got my diet in order and started taking vitamins and supplements for PMDD. I'm a little envious (read that as HATING/HATER) that I'm working my ass off and have lost 3 pounds..... and WLS folks have lost 380 pounds in 14 seconds. Of course thats my own perception. I want what I want now and I want 'snap your finger' weightloss. Oh yes, I've gone to the gym to sweat. I've eaten grilled meats and veggies and no bread. But its not rewarding me the way I thought it would. Its not rewarding me with thighs that don't rub together, a single chin instead of a double, a disappearing muffin top or the comfortable feeling when someone whips the camera out.
And my hater feelings follow me to the gym as well. I struggle to keep up a 3mph pace on the treadmill or to do the alpine program on the bike for longer than 5 minutes, whereas everyone around me is humming along like its nothing and they could stairmaster to Alaska and back without much effort.
I hate comparing myself to others but I can't make it disappear. It's not counterproductive to me.... in the sense that it'll make me stop doing what I need to do for me..... I would like to think its even inspirational..... but honestly, the hater in me wants to progress to the HATED....

So yes, that's what we will do. We will use it to go from Hater to Hated.

2 comments:

  1. Yeah see that is an element that I had not thought of. Going from the Hater to the Hated. Though I don't really WANT to be Hated... but it would be nice to stop getting the look of pity from people. Especially thin people.

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  2. Dude, the fact that you are even taking your health back is HUGE. Hell, I hate you now for having less weight to lose than I do! LOL

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